The great test of heart.

It hurts, keep going.
Push through the pain or work around it.
Find the extra: the extra motivation, the extra desire, the extra intention, the extra energy and keep moving forward.

If you get knocked down, get up.
If you get knocked down again, get up.
A third time, get up.

Don't give up, work a different strategy and follow the path.

I've realised that if you want anything in life, not only fitness, you need to push for it and work hard. Even when you feel fatigued or like quitting or you're injured.

You have to push to achieve and take from life the opportunities you seek.

Otherwise you procrastinate, stagnate and then in a blink the opportunities are gone, the ability and drive will lapse, leaving you with only regret.

Frustration

So last sunday was the City to Bay - I ran, didn't do as well as I wanted.
Afterwards discovered a fair amount of pain in my knee and calf.

I hoped it would pass - the calf pain did.
My knee, not so much.

Thought it was feeling ok today so went for a run, I didn't even get 1km in before I was hobbling around.

Fail.
Fight training tomorrow and I'm going to suck it up and push hard through the pain.
Will have to rest from running and probably cycling as well which is a pain in the arse but there isn't much else I can do :(

Fail.
Fail.
Fail.

Another post sans title.

Tonight I did kick boxing beginners and thai boxing.
Both classes where great - enjoyed them a lot.

Enjoyed pushing myself though kicks to the thai pads had a lot of fail.
Little bit sore but all good, it will pass.

The first session was good - light but good, second session (Thai) was fantastic I really enjoyed that.
Left four count, right four count, left to left four count, right to right four count, random moving kick combos.

Can really feel it stepping up.
LOVED IT!

I still have the issues in my head from yesterday - haven't got them sorted yet.
I think one other thing that is still messing with me is "WHY?" Why do I want to fight so badly?

I don't really know the answer so that's another thing to work on.

Always a lot to work on....
Another thing today the fight team ran a photoshoot for our 'promo' shots and marketing material, it was good a little uncomfortable but nothing that I couldn't handle.

I hope that I can do another one later on once I lose some more weight and stop being an overweight pale geeky guy.

Anyway that's all for now.
Later.

The unnamed post

I'm currently sitting on a bus, commuting to work and trying to figure out what I want to say.

Sunday was the city to bay and I set an ok time (1:20:44) without specifically training for it.
Running occasionally no more than 7km at a time and just doing my martial arts training.

I feel a little 'meh' about it, it impacted my martial arts training which I feel I'm getting left behind in.

I have so many goals and aims, I sometimes push myself one way only to change direction.
Not sure that's a good thing.

Perhaps I need to reevaluate everything, take stock of where I am at and make a clear cut achievable goal?

I'm still pushing to get my weight down and build the body I want, but there is much more than that.

I want to fight, I don't know why - I know I'm not that good at sparring and can't seem to relax into it.

That said - I'm tired of my body being sore, but maybe I'm not taking enough recovery.
Perhaps I just demand to much of myself and am harsh when I don't reach my goal, which is always a stretch target.

I want to run a marathon, ride the tdu challenge (138km), complete a triathlon, get lean and muscular but above all else I think I just want to be good at something other than just nerd stuff.

(Ninja Edit - I'm not on the bus - I am actually at work)

I really need to focus my thoughts and energy to achieve that.

My head is all over the place with where I'm at fitness wise - I really don't know what it is.
Not even sure what I really want any more :(

How the hell do you get around this mental state of 'MEH'?

Resting. Do not want.

Between my work schedule and pushing my body and mind hard - I feel flat. I need to rest but don't want to.

I know a few days off aren't going to set me back to square one, but I still fear slipping and wasting the hard work so far.

I need to rethink my strategy and work a better way to reach the goal.